World Adoption DayIn celebration of the upcoming 1st ever World Adoption Day on November 9th, Doog News, as an Ambassador for this exciting event, has invited friends who are connected to adoption in a variety of different ways to submit writings about adoption. Between now and November 9th we're excited to post these stories to give some insight into what life is like when it involves adoption. We encourage you to follow along and read the various postings whether it's about a family who has adopted a child, to someone who was adopted, to the perspective of an adoption counsellor, and even a family who has decided to adopt and now waits and wonders if and when they'll be parents. In all of these stories there is one common factor: love. Please join us on this celebratory journey as we lead up to World Adoption Day.
Wading through the world of adoption can certainly be overwhelming. There’s so much info to know, questions you don’t even know to ask, piles of paperwork and the most commonly wondered question by potential adoptive families who are eager to be parents: how long is the wait? Today we’re pleased to introduce you to a couple who are currently waiting parents and they’d like to share some information that they’ve learned with other families about to take the adoption path.
Adoption Process Tips
Where to begin? We’re Arlon & Kathryn, a happy, energetic & fun loving couple that would love to complete our family with a child. We met while working for the same company in 1991 – your typical co-worker-then-friends-then-more-than-friends story. We’ve now been married for over 10 years and have a very strong marriage based on respect, commitment, and love.
Kathryn can remember being a young child and telling her parents that she wanted to adopt a child, but also wanted to have biological children. In her early twenties she developed an autoimmune disease and it was at this time that her doctors advised her that she should not carry a child. We have always wanted to have a family and knew that adoption would be our way of fulfilling our dream of becoming parents. With Kathryn’s improved health the time came to finally pursue our adoption journey.
With 5 nieces and a nephew, we’re thoroughly excited to add our child in the mix. Family gatherings are very important to us and they’re always fun and full of love, laughter, and affection. We are extremely lucky to be surrounded by awesome people who not only support our decision to adopt but are also excited that we are adding a new family member to love, care for, and spoil.
We share our home with our “furkids” Bentley and Hudson, a couple of wonderful cocker spaniels, who we consider to be important members of our family. They love kids & always have fun playing with them, specially their two-legged cousins.
After thinking about it and talking about it for quite some time we finally started our adoption journey in November 2011. Kathryn did a lot of research online as to which agencies to check out, what the process entails, the time it takes, the cost, etc. It was, and continues to be, an overwhelming endeavour. But in the end, the rewards would far outweigh all the trials and tribulations we’re prepared to withstand.
Throughout this journey, we’ve met awesome people who chose to go through the same adventure and it’s great to know that we are not alone – there are others who we can relate with. It’s amazing to discover how much we’re surrounded by adoption stories, both from our own circle of friends and family and from others we’ve just met.
So where do we stand now? Well, it’s been both very exciting and very frustrating to say the least. Knowing that we’re in the “system” gives us hope that our dream of becoming parents is close at hand. The frustrating part is how slow and unclear the process can be. Other prospective and adoptive parents told us that it can be a very trying process but I don’t think either of us realized just how much patience the process would take. There’s different info for each country, nothing is set in stone and even when you feel like you’ve found it all out, the info can change in a second. With more and more couples wanting to adopt these days the agencies deal with a lot of information and often it doesn’t go as smoothly as one would hope.
We’ve discovered that there isn’t a central location for getting all the necessary information regarding the adoption process. How much is it going to cost? What forms do we need to fill out? What are the next steps? What can we do while waiting? Who do we talk to?
Here are some tips that we think would be useful for other families wanting to go through the adoption process and what might have saved us some of our delays.
We realize that agencies are busy and we aren’t the only family they are working with, but make sure to ask lots of questions. Sometimes communication can be lost between the agency and the families, so make sure you are proactive and don’t wait for the agency to contact you. Make sure you contact them. Make sure the agency lets you know what they are expected to do and what is expected by you.
Our biggest tip that we can give anybody is try to get in contact with as many families as you can that have already been through the adoption process. They are a huge source of information and support. You can ask your agency to help you make contact with other families.
But after all the frustrating bureaucratic administrative mumbo jumbo, we realize that it will all be worth it in the end. We have met some wonderful families that have been through the adoption process and we know we aren’t alone. Seeing our friends get matched with a child gives us hope that our dream of becoming parents is just around the corner. Each day we wait is another day closer to parenthood!
Many of our friends and other families waiting to adopt have asked us what we do while we are waiting. Well we try not to think too much about the waiting period, but it is only natural to wait and wonder. Our agency holds monthly waiting parent meetings that we attend. At these meetings we reconnect with other families that are at different stages of their adoption journey and we also get to hear about successful adoption stories.
We don’t want to look too far ahead, but often while we are at home watching T.V. or just hanging out we often find ourselves chatting about our dreams for our child, what vacations we will go on as a family, what activities our child will like and all the other wonderful adventures we will go on as a family.
When that day comes, all the waiting, all the frustration, would have been well worth it.
World Adoption Day is November 9th, 2014. To find out how you can join in the celebration visit WorldAdoptionDay.org and have a Doog News Day!
Doog News is proud to be an official Ambassador of World Adoption Day. Learn more about our adoption story here and we’ll be sharing more about our story this Sunday, World Adoption Day!